worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
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