i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
