He kissed a someone with a penis
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize