I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize