i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
