he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
