She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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