youre lurking in front of me
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I lost the right to judge tonight
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
