I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
