I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
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