Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I just want to make out with him forever
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
