dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize