I'll bet she douches with gravy.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
