whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
please come you make the beer taste better
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
