I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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