Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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