he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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