Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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