put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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