Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
