covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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