Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Your penis caused this!
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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