she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Boobs speak an international language.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Randomize
