dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
You took a bar mat shot.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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