Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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