he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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