This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
