I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
