He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Randomize
