God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Dicks are not precious.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
