No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize
