i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
I CAN MOONWALK!
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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