get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
