We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
