The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
