billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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