I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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