No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize