I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
