So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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