Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Randomize
