Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
