I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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