I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
