I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize