Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Randomize
