Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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