My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
