Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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