Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
