matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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